Dutch | Moroccan

My Mum is Dutch, and my Dad is Moroccan, born and raised in Casablanca, Morocco. Growing up in a small town in The Netherlands, I noticed from a young age that our family was different. I remember that my Dad was seen as ‘the Moroccan’ in our neighbourhood and some of the parents did not want to interact with him. My parents raised us to embrace both cultures equally, but since no one around us spoke Moroccan-Arabic, I never really learned how to speak the language. We would go to Morocco during summer break every year until I was 16, by car. Those road trips and vacations were some of my best memories growing up. My Dad thought us a lot about the country, the history and he would teach us how to recite the Quran. One of the superpowers you develop, is the ability to adapt to situations and people easily. I also find it enriching to be able to experience and compare both cultures I grew up with. I lean more towards my Moroccan family, especially since my Mum passed away. They’ve showed me what warmth and unconditional love is, for which I’m super grateful. It’s also nice to be different from everyone else, you stand out in a way. My skin looks White, but I’m half North African. That leads to interesting conversations sometimes. I’m very proud of my mixed background, but I do feel like I never really belong to either culture. I look more Dutch than Moroccan, but I’m too Moroccan to be seen as Dutch in the Netherlands. In the Netherlands, there is a right-wing movement going on and the underlying feeling is that ‘immigrants should integrate more or leave the country’. But even when you have integrated or even assimilated into society, you still never really belong to it. For me it’s not about how I look, but it’s my name that causes misunderstanding and awkward situations. And because of my name, I’ve also experienced racism. And those misunderstanding and awkward situations go both ways! It’s like your stuck in the middle between two cultures and have to pick one, but you can’t because it’s both who you are. In situations like that, one side always takes offence.

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