Irish/French/Bajan | Ghanaian
As much as I am always geared and ready to fight for equality and justice, the current discourse around race and identity has rehashed the internalised war of being mixed-race and battling that sense of belonging and what identity really means. I don’t look ‘typically’ mixed-race (as in my skin is not light in the way that most people imagine a mixed person) so often I’m assumed to be just Black, which I feel at times has created a pressure for me to ‘act more Black’ and hide other parts of my identity.
Race and culture were not consciously in the forefront of my mind growing up, so some of my experiences that were influenced by culture just seemed like ‘normal’ life to me. It’s only as I got older that I started to consider which aspects of my life were influenced by culture and also the parts of my life that culture was missing from, particularly in terms of my African heritage. Dad left when I was very young and so I don’t feel connected to my Ghanaian side and I wouldn’t say that I’m culturally Ghanaian. When I meet someone from one of the countries I’m from I do feel like it’s a good ice breaker or creates a sense of connection/mutual ground. This is less true for me when I meet a fellow Ghanaian though, as I’m assumed to have visited, know the language etc. So it can be quite awkward to explain that I don’t know any of these things about that part of my culture and heritage.
As an adult, I’m definitely more willing to engage and learn about different parts of my culture that I haven’t yet explored. I grew up occasionally hearing my Mum being referred to as ‘half caste’ or ‘quarter caste’ but it’s only now, years later, that I realise how offensive those terms were/are. My Grandma is part of the Windrush generation and came to Britain from Barbados when she was 2 years old. A lot of my poetry is centred around the Black British experience, race and social justice which is all heavily influenced by my own direct experience within these realms.
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In collaboration with Poetic Unity