Polish | Nigerian
My Mum is Polish, and my Dad is Nigerian. They met when they were students at the Technical University of Lodz in Poland. My Dad was an international student there. Unfortunately, my Dad went back to Nigeria when I was very young. We stayed behind. I don’t think it was due to the cultural differences though. I don’t know the ins and outs of why my parents separated. Having said that, I think they managed the cultural aspect well when they were together. They’re still friends now. I have to acknowledge my Polish Grandparents here; they embraced my Father, my sister and me. Our skin colour meant nothing to them, that level of tolerance was unusual in those days.
Once, I posted a picture of my Mum, Dad and me. Someone shared it, and one lady commented: ‘Not location, not race and not the skin colour make the basis of a friendship or love but the heart and soul’. I couldn’t say it better.
It makes me sad when derogatory comments are made by one group about the other, in front of me. People forget that I’m White as well as Black. Folks feel free to say things (to me or in front of me) that they wouldn’t dare say if they had ‘the other’ in their midst. Once, a friend said something thoughtless and I reacted. So then, she said, ‘oh, I forgot you’re one of them’. One of them? What does that even mean? I hate the ‘us vs. them’ talks. They break my heart. Thankfully, people who are close to me are reasonable and these things don’t happen often. When they do though, I quickly try to draw a line reminding them that I don’t take sides. I refuse to judge people by their race, or culture. I pray to be able to judge them fairly; by what they do individually and not by who they are collectively. I’m sure I don’t always get it a 100% right either.
I try to read books by Nigerian authors. One of my favourites is ‘Half of the Yellow Sun’ by Chimamanda Ngozi. The following quote comes from that book, ‘If the sun refuses to rise we will make it rise’. I think this quote encompasses a very Nigerian trait i.e. ‘never give up, never surrender’.
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