Pakistani | Trinidadian

I identify as mixed-race, British and Muslim. My Mum is Pakistani born in the UK and my Dad is Trinidadian and was born in Trinidad. My parents split when I was 11 and from then I saw less of my Dads’ side and more of my Mothers. The majority of my life I have lived with my Pakistani family and I grew up closely around my Grandparents and Uncle’s, so I was fortunate enough to learn and understand Urdu. I’ve always been aware that I’m different from a young age, a lot of my experiences with racism from has been from Pakistani’s. In secondary school I faced racism for being Muslim, I wasn’t considered ‘Black’ enough by my White friends because in their eyes I didn’t act like a Black person should. I was always asked which did I prefer being Trinidadian or Pakistani? This was mad confusing because I was like, why can’t I just be both? Which is me! I’ve always known I’m different because of how I’ve been treated. I think South Asians definitely have a certain level of privilege over Black people and they tend to take cover behind the umbrella of POC and BAME to hide their anti-Black views, like they can’t be racist because they’re also people of colour. I feel like there needs to be more discussions about this in the South Asian community. I don’t know if people are scared to talk about it, in fear being labelled racist, or because they haven’t realised their own privileges and don’t see themselves as the issue. I was raised a Muslim and grew up around Islamic values. The Masjid my family go to in Seven Sisters is extremely diverse and I think that’s the beauty of Islam, colour isn’t an issue and not a point of judgement, diversity is celebrated you only have to read the Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) final sermon to understand that. So it’s frustrating when I see how much racism there is amongst Muslims, where nationality is placed in front community and humanity. Overall, I love being mixed-race & Muslim. The food, the celebrations, the culture, the style of clothing, everything is so colourful. If I had the chance to be reborn I’d comeback as myself. Because I love being me. Flaws and all.

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