Dutch | Moroccan
The moment that really changed my life was the time I finally accepted the fact that I was Gay. I never really came out, because I didn’t want to make such a big deal out of it, but when I did come out to myself it felt freeing. I worked hard on accepting this new part of me even though I kept that for myself most of the time. But the moment I proudly could tell people about my sexuality, it felt like a weight lifted off my shoulders. I finally had an answer to why I never felt like I could fit in and now it really felt like I could let go of other people's expectations. I am now feeling more and more comfortable in the way I present myself and even though I still have moments where I feel insecure about myself I will always try to embrace whatever is coming my way.
Growing up I noticed that people really enjoy pointing out all the features I have that are maybe not so common for them. I used to hear many comments about my eyebrows, my hair or my lashes and most of the time these were positive and I would just take it as a compliment but it always made me feel a bit like I was looking different then the people around me.
But when I got older I also began to realize the people around me who would have very strong opinions about immigrants. Even though I haven’t had extreme encounters with these people, hearing stories from my Dad or other family members that did have these encounters would always make me very upset and angry.
A year ago I came to the conclusion that I have always been insecure about the part of me that is Moroccan. I remember that as a kid I never felt like I was Moroccan enough to really be a part of that community. I am noticing that my view on my ethnic background is changing at the moment. I am only nineteen and I know that there is so much of my identity that I haven’t figured out yet and it’s just only now that I start to see how much of myself I owe to my Moroccan heritage. I am starting to be more proud of my background and the fact that I am a beautiful mix of two fascinating cultures.
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